A sadly not so unique situation

As I mentioned in my last post. I have recently reconnected with an old friend from seminary. It's been fun catching up and reading her blog and emails about life as a rural church pastor. There was recent discussion about reaching young adults. I know many of you fall into that category. Many of you know that while we want something- we don't always know what that something is.
Someone commented on her post and posted a link to this web site

http://www.dearchurch.com/

Let me tell you- this girl is honest and what makes me sad is that I can so relate. What makes me even more sad is that it's not uncommon that people feel this way about the church. I was just saying to friend if it weren't for my deep faith and previous ah ha's about how God can work through random situations... I would not be a Christian after my last job. Yep, I know that sounds harsh, but it's true. Yea, my parents tell me that people ask about me. But once I stopped working there no co workers contacted me, yes they heard about me through others, but when you kick someone who is sick and hurting to the curb-- you DON'T leave them to flounder. So I walk away thinking that pretty much I was just a staff member, not a friend, not even a congregation member... But a body... That's it. Yes, I still hold bitterness. Yes, I would NEVER EVER recommend someone go there. Yes, I will still share my faith. I will still live for Christ. I will still pray for the kids I worked with and those I wasn't able to reach. Cause that's what God has put on my heart. Do I know that God wants me to forgive the leaders of the church I come from-- certainly. But right now I can't. Right now it's still to fresh.

It was a growing experience. Yes, I think my life would be different in good ways and bad if I hadn't been there. . . And I know that one day I will forgive them. But right now I ache for that place. I ache for the lack of care. The hypocrisy. The apathy. I ache that those who walk through those doors to meet Christ for the first time will be disillusioned as to what He's all about.

It's about a lifestyle. It's about a beleive that doesn't disapear when times get tough. It's about a faith that holds to hope in a dark world. I didn't intend for this email to be a rant-- but apparently that's on my heart. Check out the website. I find it interesting and insightful.

ck

Christmas cards

So, I guess we are offically into the Christmas card season. I personally love getting Christmas cards. I especially love the ones that have pictures (hm, imagine that) and letters about what's been going on. Ryan and I differ on the letter thing. So our compromise is doing a picture... which neither of us actually want to be in, but I bought the cards last year after Christmas- so we will go forward with the comprimise. Anway, back to my point. I love getting mail in general, but I love finding out what people have been up to (much like I love to read everyone's blogs). Even though for most people we recieve cards/ letters from we know what the story is... there is something about the humor, insight and love that is poured into a letter.

Lets face it there are people we care about but don't talk to all the time cause life just hasn't allowed for that for one reason or another. I love catching up with people who I have lost touch with. Just this past month I have had just that opportunity. My friend Stacey is a great example. A friend from Seminary that came across my blog through another mutual friends blog. We haven't talked since I left and she is now in NY and I am in GR and we have been able to reconect through our blogs... It's like a Christmas card whenever you want!

I think it's a hard thing in our age group & the day of technoligy when everyone can keep in touch in various other ways and well frankly... I don't have most people's address. Even those I love- rarely to I send snail mail. None the less, I love finding out what people have been up to. I love knowing that every person was an part of my life in some way & I want to know what's new.

So... what about you. Do you send Christmas cards? Do you put a picture or a letter in them? My family has always done this. Ryan's family never has cause from their experience they are usually brag letters (I never believed this til I actually read one and yep, it was). Who would you love to hear from the Christmas if you could chose anyone?

Don't forget to comment. I would love to hear what your traditions are for Christmas comunication. And well, I just wanna know who's reading my nonsense thoughts! :)

Have a great day!
ck

Til then... here is a card I put together for my dear friends. BTW: animals and people together are hard to photograph!! :) Thanks Erin & Mark- it was great to see you!

I'm part of a new phenomenom

It's awesome... and if you aren't on board-- well you should be. It's a phenomenon called "vacation". I think it's possibly the most wonderful thing next to weekends (when you don't work at a church- cause then there is no such thing).

But, this vacation thing... GREAT!! I left work at 3 today cause well our supervisers wanted to go home. So, we got paid til 5 and got a few hours to really let it set in that I get to experience "vacation" for the first time in 4 years. Yep, our honeymoon wasn't a vacation-- I was stressed about leaving work just wondering what "issue" I would return to... and indeed the boss had issues-- as he always did. You could say that since I haven't worked since late March-- that was vacation, no not when you are sicker than a dog and have no idea what's going on.

This my friends is vacation. Leaving a project on the desk to be continued when I turn my computer back on on Monday. Being able to spend all day with Ryan tomorrow. Shooting family pictures for a great friend on Friday. Decorating for Christmas in our new house. I can't wait. All of this while knowing that I am not going to get a call from my boss on Friday at 9:30 cause he thinks I should be at work when the office is closed, but he needs something. While knowing that that project will be there just fine while I am away and no one is going to be mad, destraught, or raging angry cause it isn't on their desk 15 min after it was assigned/ first discussed.

I am so thankful that I have discovered so much in the past year. I am so thankful to have a new job, with new posibilities. I am so thankful that God has provided in so many ways!

I am so thankful for a new experience called "vacation"!!!

Have a great thanksgiving everyone!
ck

Meet Jen & Aaron

I had a great engagement session today. This is Jen & Aaron. I am shooting their wedding in March. They are a super cute and fun couple and I can't wait to capture their celebration on film.

There a few more on my glimpse of their pics on my photo blog.

I hope you are all having a great day!
Off to edit pics!
ck

Another great day.

I just wanted to check in. I am loving the new job and find it fun to have every day be a little different-- but most importantly I love being part of a team process. As I have said many times to those who know me well. I am a leader, however I love mostly to be part of something with others... not be the one who makes it all happen. (Hense the downfall of my last 4 years- it fell on me).

I love that I am part of a team- working to find information that puts the peices together for a bigger cause/ project.

I love that I work with 8 other people my age (ok, well 6 of them are about my age).

I love that when it's 5pm I go home.

I don't like that it's dark when I go to work and dark when I come home.

I love the sense of production- being able to get one step closer to being done with a part of the project.

I love lunch room conversations. (yep, we have a cafeteria- and it's fit for great social interaction)

I love so much that I am back to having productive days.

I went to the library last night and checked out a bunch of photography books. I was reading in one and I don't remember what the particular illistration was for- but it was a part of "Alice in Wonderland"--
it's the part where
Alice says to the chesire cat-- "which way do I go?"
the cat says- "well, where are you trying to go?"
Alice simply answers- "I don't know"
the cat says- "if you don't know where you are going it doesn't matter which way you go"

Sometimes I think we think we have to do certain things (jobs) to fulfil a calling, a degree, a role. But in the end-- I think it's about using who you are to the best ability you can and using it to build relationships, using your skills to be part of something bigger than yourself. And here I feel like I am doing that without feeling like I am carying the whole thing.

Things coming up: I am doing the engagement pics for Jen and Aaron on Saturday- It's supposed to be good weather.

I am doing another couple on December 10.

December 18th we are going to my parents for Christmas. The following wednesday we leave for North Carolina to spend a week with Ryan's family.

I can't believe how fast this year went. I just realized yesterday when talking to my mom that I got sick in March and really haven't worked full time or regular days since then. WOW! That would explain why I am so tired. But, no worries. I am taking care of me and sleeping and eating what I should (for some reason I really haven't had a appetite- ah, to be doing things again) And I am pretty sure that if I wore my pedomiter at work I walk about 1.5 miles a day. My work shoes aren't made for or used to that!

Anyway- I'm done rambling. Hope you are all having a great week.
ck

designing templates

I have been busy today cleaning the house and getting things in order to when I work this week life doesn't suddenly turn crazy! I have also recently been working on templates for Christmas cards, and save the date cards for weddings, birth announcments, etc. These are couple examples of cards I have done so far. I am working on some more Christmas ones. Please (not that I think you would steal them... but) these are copyrighted to me and can't be used by others. Basically how they work is I have designed a template and I can insert a families picture in and have it printed like you would your normal Christmas cards. :) I am have more coming... but I thought I would give you a sneak peak.

Note: If anyone is interested in these or other ones I put up- let me know you can email your family pic and I can insert and have them printed. :)

joy

Yesterday I got a job!!! I am working for 5/3 Bank. I will be in their comercial loans department (sounds like I should know something financial, huh?). I am processing loans. I am really excited about it. For many reasons, but I am sure a big one is releif to be working a consistant schedule (this is a healthy move for me). I will be working 8-5 monday through friday (and now when I say I have bankers hours, I really do!)

Here is the catch. It's a temp job and they are bringing 10 of us in. It could be a week- 3 months... I am a hard worker and someone who is eager to learn and help out. I pray that they see that and keep me for longer and maybe even offer me a job (willing I like it too). So please pray that it ends up being a good experience for all. The temp place said- if they like you and don't need you around longer they will likely ask that you get moved to a different assignment.

Here's to new opportunities. Here is to the start of a new path. Here is still hoping to follow the dream of photography. Here is to weekends!

ck

Love this

I just wanted to share this quote that I got off Tara Whitney's blog. I love it and it's so true-- especially from the photography perspective!

"Do I like smiles? Yes, but only if they are real and filled with life. And I also like tears. You see, truth is beautiful, no matter what the expression." Randy Bacon


Truth is beautiful... even if we don't like it.
ck

Love this

I just wanted to share this quote that I got off Tara Whitmey's blog. I love it and it's so true-- especially from the photography perspective!

"Do I like smiles? Yes, but only if they are real and filled with life. And I also like tears. You see, truth is beautiful, no matter what the expression." Randy Bacon


Truth is beautiful... even if we don't like it.
ck

I really am trying

I'm so frustrated. Tired of people inplying that I am not trying to find a job. GRRR... I just spent 6 hours online looking for jobs- I applied for a TON of them and have several more I have to call about tomorrow. 1 hour looking through the paper (sometimes I find that easier). I have that interview on Thursday. I don't know what the hell else I am supposed to do. I am not sitting on my ass waiting for something to land in my lap.

After I find out on Thursday what I get with that I will be dropping my body by Meijer cause they are hiring 3rd shift. And well hell if I get sick again-- oh well-- We have to pay the bills!

(Do you sense frustration!!!!!!!?????)
Anyway, I just wanted to say that I am tired of not knowing what's next. Waiting day in and day out to see what new things I can apply for.... and wait for. And damn it I am not sitting here just warming the couch!

On a encouraging note I am officially booked to shoot a wedding on March 24th!! :) I am doing their engagment pics on Saturday (the 18th). I am supper pumped about the photography end of life-- just wish I was going to have more time to do it! I will get there eventually. And I keep telling myself-- in 4.5 years when mail is addressed to Dr & Mrs Kennedy--- life will be better... well at least we will be able to pay the bills cause we WON'T be living in a big house just cause we can! We just won't!

ck

Snapping out of it!

Feeling somewhat better. I am achy all over from coughing constantly. It's a productive caugh though-- so I guess that's good. I am hoping that next week starts a big turn around for job situation. Pretty much I am just convinced that no one wants someone who worked at a church to work for them! Part of me doesn't blame them. But Erin and I (and both our husbands) have come to the conclusion that I neither one of us could have a worse boss than the former one. So off to find new jobs-- ones that treat us with respect! Here's to hoping that Thursday's interview goes awesome!

Here are some pics of the girls from the weekend. These pics can't help but make you smile! And one of my best friends is pregnant (I won't say her name since she hasn't made any official announcments). I am so excited for them and that I get to be an honorary aunt!! I can't wait til May! YAY!!
The first pic is of E- she is pretty priceless with her girly girl get up! She LOVES to play and dress up and have princess anything! We got this princess dress for $6 at Marshals and she loved it (I figure you can't get dress up clothes for that). Anyway-- This is her playing princess and setting up a tea party for her and my mom (Grammy).
The other 2 are on the Carosel at the mall. Kara really did love it in spite of the look in the first pic. The second one was taken while we were riding. Hillarious! This girl LOVES to smile & laugh. We like to think she takes after me! :)